These are ideas I have for a lolcow quote randomizer.
Trash from Twitter
"Ah yes, so glad this 40 year old cis white guy is informing us on how to feel about his shitty takes that totally aren't transphobic" -Eris 'UltimateDSfan' Ray, which is also white
"Fuck you :)"
"In every gay relationship there's the one that takes 6 minutes to get ready and the one that takes 600 minutes to get ready...I am currently waiting for Eris to finish getting ready" -UltimateDSfan's ex-girlfriend in a deleted tweet
"I literally can't have kids at all because I don't have the gonads I was born with anymore. If you think that's my fault in ANY way, that my sterility was within my power to stop or delay, fuck you." -Kevin/Kathryn Gibes, one of UltimateDSfan's predecessors
"i have always wanted to ratio autism speaks" -Nintendude, a Twittard that couldn't devise a good comeback
"Sonic is trans now, this is canon" -RosieRoberta, an ephebozoophilic Twittard
"Haha, flags go brrrr" -PearlTrans, fighting bigotry with bigotry. Quite fitting for a transcel
"Terrifying realization I can never un-realize: Shadow the Hedgehog is a trans allegory" -Gamechamp3k acting like a bigoted ephebophile
"Nice book. Too bad it was all plagiarized from the dictionary"
"Unfollow me, thanks"
Ridiculousness from Roblox
"^ terrible show stop"
"I can report you for insulting." -a thin-skinned nuisance
"Your stupid."
"she's dum"
"dumby"
"yeah run little girl"
"stupid go back to the complex"
"You have issues"
"i dont care -.-"
"hey go to hell"
"ID WANT TO"
"FREE MODELS AND CRAP" -a hypocrite that claimed to be nice in its blurb
"ur adopted btw"
"You scamming '12er brat."
"I REPORTED U!"
"NOB NOB NOB"
"aw poor baby" -stated the one that didn't have the mental capacity to type a counterargument
"I will make you suffer"
"tl;dr nobody cares go home"
"This game is so edgy, I got a papercut from this sht." -a Zim/Dib shipper
"suck your moms penis"
"Unliking!"
Frustration from Forums
"cool story nobody fucking cares" -Joshua "Null" Moon replying to flamebait it added a mod note to and other posters fell for
"Your politics are shit and no one cares. Agree to disagree."
"named after anime because anime makes you gay"
"DILATE DILATE DILATE TRANNY" -an A-Log on Kiwi Farms
"That's probably your first mistake."
"Official Kiwifarms Man-Hate Thread" -from a site run by a man(child)
"The customer is always right; cry to your manager!"
"waa waa waa no1curr" -one of lolcow.farm's moderators falling for the Streisand Effect
"shit thread, wrong board" -typical response to fresh information being submitted to lolcow.farm
"obvious selfposting"
"Emulation is illegal. Talking about emulation is prohibited." -Clayton/Kimonio, a hillbilly I saw on a gaming forum over a decade ago
"asking too many questions"
"shut up retard quit crying and trying to police threads" -fag0t, the second most prominent A-log on Onion Farms
"lol calm down"
"I am a proud clopper
Immaturity from YouTubers
"The Knuckles Show Isn't Bad, You Guys are Just Mean" -LS Mark being a pot (lol fat) calling the kettle black
"I PAID ANNOYING ORANGE $35 TO SAY THIS"
"I literally play Pokemon professionally" -SmallAnt, a cow that apparently classifies missing social cues as professional
"CommanderVideo is bisexual and is canonically dating Radbot" -a gaywasher
"Just Ban My Account Already..." -Mutahar 'SomeOrdinaryGamers' Anas, an enabler of predators
"This is the greatest attention seeking of all time" -penguinz0/Cr1tikal, which can never decide when to be serious or not
"Using Discord is not a social life." -Luke Smith, a cow with no friends
"I Removed Cappy from Mario Odyssey" -Fir thinking it's so cool for removing a core gameplay element instead of just playing Avenging Spirit instead
"FUCK OFF FUCKLEY WHISTLE WAS A GOOD SONG"
"For example, electrons move through reality"
*sigh* "Wow."
Miscellaneous
"^ that account blocked me for shipping skwisgaar and toki wtf"
"What an attention seeker."
"Judging a person doesn't define who they are, it defines who you are."
"nobody cares" -a frequent lie from cows that miss social cues
"The mineral fortification was hard to disguise, and because of the veggie and legume content, three bites of the Dilberito made you fart so hard your intestines formed a tail." -Scott Adams
"Shit answer." -Shii-la, a hypocritical a**hole on Miitomo's Answer Central for Europe/Australia
"Shut your fucking mouth about Donald Trump he's a gay fucking cunt" -a cow that didn't know how to properly criticize
"I have never insulted anyone you stupid bitch."
"Be a Swiftie. It's good for your mental health."
"Vimm can bite my furry two-tailed ass. Bitch." -Kitsune Sniper
"fuck Ruben Sim. He got my snake cock piss latex fetish RP game taken down from Roblox."
"Nostalgia Ninja had sex with a baby"
"There is nothing here. Go away." -presumably MainMemory being stupid